Just browsing through the list of winners, there seem to be few suprises, Artic Monkeys, Kaiser Chiefs, blah blah blah. (If anyone has heard the A.M. album I'd like to know what you think - the more I've heard of them, the more they seem to be a northern Libertines rather than anything particularly special). The gong-giving appeared to be pretty predictable, and I could think to myself, "Yes, even if I don't agree with the awards per se, at least I know where they are coming from."
However, two awards have confounded me.
Best Film - Harry Potter
Sexiest Female - Madonna
Harry Potter as best film. Now, although I can accept that people over 16 can enjoy Harry Potter, I'd have thought that they're not going to consider it their favorite film. Therefore, to age the voters, I'd guess somewhere in the region of 10 - 15.
But then we have Madonna winning sexiest female. First things first, Madonna isn't sexy. I am stating that as a fact. I am willing to accept she looks good FOR HER AGE. But the video of her Abba cover-song-thing makes my skin crawl. I can't watch it.
So who voted her sexiest female? If we assume that it is the same readers who voted Harry Potter best film, then there are some very strange teenage boys out there.
Friday, February 24, 2006
Thursday, February 23, 2006
TV Comments: A Collection
My first day at the PC for a week - a combination of a) a 3-hour aptitude test (went well, I think, although still waiting for a call back) b) buying a kitchen (eek) and c) getting rid of old kitchen for said new kitchen. Oh, and fitting in some research. Ahem.
Anywho, I have had time to collect some mini posts about various TV happenings over the past few days that I present to you now.
1. "The Apprentice" - BBC 2. Last Night
I've kind of avoided "reality" television/game shows pretty well for the past 2 or 3 years (save an unfortuante episode of X-Factor whilst in Bristol). However, with absolutely nothing else on TV last night, and the DVD player all of 2 metres from my armchair, I decided to give the Apprentice a shot.
There are two teams, one male, the other female. At the start, each team had a meeting to decide on a team name. I hate coming up with names for things so the televised naming scene was particularly uncomfortable for me.
Now I understand that the problem with the apprentice is that you don't want to be seen contributing nothing. However, the guy who speaks out first wants to have a good name - you don't want to look stoopid. "The A-Team", he says. Doh! The other team members can barely hold in their laughter. The guy notices this, so later tries to cover the earlier rubbish name with another. "I actually have another name idea," he announces, "How about Winners." Oh crap, that's even worst.
I hate coming up with names for things (in particular pub quiz team names), so I really felt for this guy. Thus, I am considering doing a George Foreman when it comes to monikering my kids. Not that I have any , nor am I planning to have any until I am at least 30. Which, Dartmoor Rescue Age Estimator Man, is not for another 4 years.
2. "It's Me or the Dog" - Channel 4, Thursdays or something.
When exactly did it become considered a good way to advertise a television programme with an excerpt of a lady saying "Will we have to castrate? I. Don't. Know."?
3. Westcountry Lunchtime News. ITV, er, Lunchtime
Top headline from Westcountry News yesterday: "A man is concerned after finding a dead duck on a trading estate. The government stated that after considering the case, it isn't bird flu. The man remains concerned."
4. 10 Years Younger. Channel 4, Thursdays or something.
One of the many, many things that troubles me about this programme is how bad the people at the start of the show are at estimating the victim's age. Where do they find people who estimate someone who is quite clearly under 40 as 63?
Dartmoor Resuce, that's where.
I am now letting that go.
Anywho, I have had time to collect some mini posts about various TV happenings over the past few days that I present to you now.
1. "The Apprentice" - BBC 2. Last Night
I've kind of avoided "reality" television/game shows pretty well for the past 2 or 3 years (save an unfortuante episode of X-Factor whilst in Bristol). However, with absolutely nothing else on TV last night, and the DVD player all of 2 metres from my armchair, I decided to give the Apprentice a shot.
There are two teams, one male, the other female. At the start, each team had a meeting to decide on a team name. I hate coming up with names for things so the televised naming scene was particularly uncomfortable for me.
Now I understand that the problem with the apprentice is that you don't want to be seen contributing nothing. However, the guy who speaks out first wants to have a good name - you don't want to look stoopid. "The A-Team", he says. Doh! The other team members can barely hold in their laughter. The guy notices this, so later tries to cover the earlier rubbish name with another. "I actually have another name idea," he announces, "How about Winners." Oh crap, that's even worst.
I hate coming up with names for things (in particular pub quiz team names), so I really felt for this guy. Thus, I am considering doing a George Foreman when it comes to monikering my kids. Not that I have any , nor am I planning to have any until I am at least 30. Which, Dartmoor Rescue Age Estimator Man, is not for another 4 years.
2. "It's Me or the Dog" - Channel 4, Thursdays or something.
When exactly did it become considered a good way to advertise a television programme with an excerpt of a lady saying "Will we have to castrate? I. Don't. Know."?
3. Westcountry Lunchtime News. ITV, er, Lunchtime
Top headline from Westcountry News yesterday: "A man is concerned after finding a dead duck on a trading estate. The government stated that after considering the case, it isn't bird flu. The man remains concerned."
4. 10 Years Younger. Channel 4, Thursdays or something.
One of the many, many things that troubles me about this programme is how bad the people at the start of the show are at estimating the victim's age. Where do they find people who estimate someone who is quite clearly under 40 as 63?
Dartmoor Resuce, that's where.
I am now letting that go.
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
The Times Are A Changin'... Maybe
OK, so posts are few and far between, but I thought I'd give a quick update. Main reason for no posts = job interview on Friday for nice looking local job as an *Cough* IT Geek *Cough*. I'm not sure if I meant for it to get as far as me seriously considering getting a real job, but the chance to do a 3 hour aptitude test was just too tempting.
Unfortunately for Mrs P., she has a chest infection with a bit of pleurisy, which isn't, as I thought, a Medieval condition requiring the administration of leaches, but a swelling around the lungs. It's pretty uncomfortable, but she's improving.
Finally, my lack of posts may be in part due to the blackening of my mood. Sunday I helped the Dartmoor Rescue Group by lying on the moors for two hours pretending to be seriously injured. They had to come and find me and pretend to treat me, etc. As part of procedure they radio back to control some information. "Can we have an estimate of his age, please".
The estimate?
30.
Unfortunately for Mrs P., she has a chest infection with a bit of pleurisy, which isn't, as I thought, a Medieval condition requiring the administration of leaches, but a swelling around the lungs. It's pretty uncomfortable, but she's improving.
Finally, my lack of posts may be in part due to the blackening of my mood. Sunday I helped the Dartmoor Rescue Group by lying on the moors for two hours pretending to be seriously injured. They had to come and find me and pretend to treat me, etc. As part of procedure they radio back to control some information. "Can we have an estimate of his age, please".
The estimate?
30.
Wednesday, February 08, 2006
Parsons Watch
Guess who's back, back again.
Parsons's back, tell a friend.
A Tony Writes.
Tony Parsons has bored me. His writing is bad and I feel it unfair that other Parsonses who write are being ignored each week. Therefore I'm going to compare the writings of other Parsons against Tony's headlines of the week.
Tony Sez: Lippy Pete in the Aisle of Dream
LM Parsons Sez: Myogenic and morphogenetic defects in the heart tubes of murine embryos lacking the homeo box gene Nkx2-5 - Genes and Development, Vol. 19
Seeing that I don't really understand Tony's titile, LM wins by default. Gotta love those Nkx2-5 genes.
Parsons of the Week
"You're listening to DJ Seargent "Sparky" Parsons, coming at with you both barrels and a Howitzer." is just one of the many things that this week's special Parsons may say. That's because "Sparky" Parsons is a toy based on a radio operator from World War II.
When designing a toy, the surname has got to be right. By choosing Parsons, the company has correctly identified that it conveys bravery, intelligence and an aptitude for light entertainment and talking over the latest Vera Lynn song - essential qualities in the infantry radio man.
Parsons in Music
Indian music is immensely deep and intricate, generating some of the most technically adept musicians in world music: Ravi Shankar, Buddhadev Das Gupta, Kula Shaker. It also inspired this week's Parsons musician, David Parsons.
Dave actually taught himself the sitar which, after the bagpipes and the recorder, is the most annoying instrument to listen to a beginner play. Luckily for Dave, he lived in New Zealand, so his initial lack of musical talent was nothing new. Soon he moved to India and learnt to play properly. The rest, as they say, is a very long and boring story.
Parsons's back, tell a friend.
A Tony Writes.
Tony Parsons has bored me. His writing is bad and I feel it unfair that other Parsonses who write are being ignored each week. Therefore I'm going to compare the writings of other Parsons against Tony's headlines of the week.
Tony Sez: Lippy Pete in the Aisle of Dream
LM Parsons Sez: Myogenic and morphogenetic defects in the heart tubes of murine embryos lacking the homeo box gene Nkx2-5 - Genes and Development, Vol. 19
Seeing that I don't really understand Tony's titile, LM wins by default. Gotta love those Nkx2-5 genes.
Parsons of the Week
"You're listening to DJ Seargent "Sparky" Parsons, coming at with you both barrels and a Howitzer." is just one of the many things that this week's special Parsons may say. That's because "Sparky" Parsons is a toy based on a radio operator from World War II.When designing a toy, the surname has got to be right. By choosing Parsons, the company has correctly identified that it conveys bravery, intelligence and an aptitude for light entertainment and talking over the latest Vera Lynn song - essential qualities in the infantry radio man.
Parsons in Music
Indian music is immensely deep and intricate, generating some of the most technically adept musicians in world music: Ravi Shankar, Buddhadev Das Gupta, Kula Shaker. It also inspired this week's Parsons musician, David Parsons.
Dave actually taught himself the sitar which, after the bagpipes and the recorder, is the most annoying instrument to listen to a beginner play. Luckily for Dave, he lived in New Zealand, so his initial lack of musical talent was nothing new. Soon he moved to India and learnt to play properly. The rest, as they say, is a very long and boring story.
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace
I knew I wasn't going to enjoy the IT crowd that much, and I was right. The endless promoverts from C4 left little to be discovered in the episodes. Chris Morris was amusing as the Big Boss, although he did constantly remind me of the singer from Electric 6. But the rest of it was disappoingtingly average, dropping on occasion to outright poor.
One good aspect however, was seeing Richard Ayoade (as Maurice Moss) again. You may have recognised him from Nathan Barley. The reason I enjoyed seeing him was because he always reminds me of Garth Marenghi's Darkplace, a superb Channel 4 comedy, cruelly tossed aside after one series due to low viewing figures. Well, here's a tip if you want higher viewing figures: don't show it at 11:45 on a thursday evening.
Despite a distinct lack of repeats, let alone a DVD release, there is thankfully Garth Marenghi's website which documents Garth's career as a horror writer. I find it very humerous, especially the spoof blurbs to his many books, such as this one for "Slicer". It is an excellent pisstake of a genre that badly needs it and I sit in hope that one day that C4 will see fit to at least give the TV show another airing.
PS. On further looking, I see there is a "Save Darkplace" website, which tells you everything about the show, and the possibility of a DVD release. Hoorah!
One good aspect however, was seeing Richard Ayoade (as Maurice Moss) again. You may have recognised him from Nathan Barley. The reason I enjoyed seeing him was because he always reminds me of Garth Marenghi's Darkplace, a superb Channel 4 comedy, cruelly tossed aside after one series due to low viewing figures. Well, here's a tip if you want higher viewing figures: don't show it at 11:45 on a thursday evening.
Despite a distinct lack of repeats, let alone a DVD release, there is thankfully Garth Marenghi's website which documents Garth's career as a horror writer. I find it very humerous, especially the spoof blurbs to his many books, such as this one for "Slicer". It is an excellent pisstake of a genre that badly needs it and I sit in hope that one day that C4 will see fit to at least give the TV show another airing.
PS. On further looking, I see there is a "Save Darkplace" website, which tells you everything about the show, and the possibility of a DVD release. Hoorah!
Thursday, February 02, 2006
Napolean Dynamite
First of all let's crowbar in a belated, but not unrelated, Cartoon of the Week from the great Pearls Before Swine.
The problem with message boards is knowing if the purveyor of some hysterically dumb comment really believes what they are typing, or whether the poster is knowingly commenting in a dastardly stupid way for their own humour. Take the following example.
This week I watched Napolean Dynamite, a film I enjoyed a lot. After watching a film, I enjoy mosying over to the Internet Movie Database and having a look at their message boards so that I can get angry about some ejit bad-mouthing something I've just enjoyed, or pityng the people who scream that some piece of derivative drivel is the Best Movie Ever.
An amusing part of the film is when the eponymous hero has to deliver an episode of news to the rest of his class. He's a bit of a fantasist and his story goes along the lines of:
"Last week, Japanese scientists placed explosive detonators at the bottom of Lake Loch Ness to blow Nessie out of the water. Sir Godfrey of the Nessie Alliance summoned the help of Scotland's local wizards to cast a protective spell over the lake and its local residents and all those who seek for the peaceful existence of our underwater ally."
In the context of the film, it is quite amusing. But not as amusing as this thread created by ironhills in the aforementioned IMDB message board. Basically Ironhead wants to know if this is based on a true news story, perhaps in a "and finally..." kind of slot. He continues his replies arguing that this news is going on all the time, but people are blind to it. I found it very funny.
I just have to believe that there are people outthere stupid enough. It's not too hard...
The problem with message boards is knowing if the purveyor of some hysterically dumb comment really believes what they are typing, or whether the poster is knowingly commenting in a dastardly stupid way for their own humour. Take the following example.
This week I watched Napolean Dynamite, a film I enjoyed a lot. After watching a film, I enjoy mosying over to the Internet Movie Database and having a look at their message boards so that I can get angry about some ejit bad-mouthing something I've just enjoyed, or pityng the people who scream that some piece of derivative drivel is the Best Movie Ever.
An amusing part of the film is when the eponymous hero has to deliver an episode of news to the rest of his class. He's a bit of a fantasist and his story goes along the lines of:
"Last week, Japanese scientists placed explosive detonators at the bottom of Lake Loch Ness to blow Nessie out of the water. Sir Godfrey of the Nessie Alliance summoned the help of Scotland's local wizards to cast a protective spell over the lake and its local residents and all those who seek for the peaceful existence of our underwater ally."
In the context of the film, it is quite amusing. But not as amusing as this thread created by ironhills in the aforementioned IMDB message board. Basically Ironhead wants to know if this is based on a true news story, perhaps in a "and finally..." kind of slot. He continues his replies arguing that this news is going on all the time, but people are blind to it. I found it very funny.
I just have to believe that there are people outthere stupid enough. It's not too hard...
Wednesday, February 01, 2006
Reasons to like Neighbours...1, 2, 3, 4.
I've not made a secret of the fact that I like Neighbours. It amuses me. However, this week it has risen to become my Favorite Soap Ever (Er, not really that much of an accolade, but hey). It has nothing to do with the storyline or the characters. No. It has everything to do with the show's new policy of giving each episode a title.
This week the episodes have been titled: "Tangled Up in Roo", "Shelter from the Storm", "Tombstone Blues" and "Blood on the Max?". These are great, great titles for a teatime soap opera.
For anyone who hasn't noticed, three of the four titles are inspired by perhaps my favorite album of all time, "Blood on the Tracks", by Bob Dylan. "Tombstone Blues" is a track from another of my favorite ever albums, "Highway 61 Revisted". The fact that a teatime soap opera is using Dylan tracks to name its shows is something to derive joy from and gives me hope for not only our Australian cousins, but the world as a whole.
If the using of Bob's songs wasn't enough, a couple of them are even puntastic. Brilliant! You see, there's a bad guy called Roo who some other guys are "tangled up with". Then there's Max who goes to get a tattoo - but does he go through with it? Hence "Blood on the Max?". I truly think that the titles come first and then the writers were made to come up with stories to fit them. It's flippin' superb and made my week. Honestly.
This week the episodes have been titled: "Tangled Up in Roo", "Shelter from the Storm", "Tombstone Blues" and "Blood on the Max?". These are great, great titles for a teatime soap opera.
For anyone who hasn't noticed, three of the four titles are inspired by perhaps my favorite album of all time, "Blood on the Tracks", by Bob Dylan. "Tombstone Blues" is a track from another of my favorite ever albums, "Highway 61 Revisted". The fact that a teatime soap opera is using Dylan tracks to name its shows is something to derive joy from and gives me hope for not only our Australian cousins, but the world as a whole.
If the using of Bob's songs wasn't enough, a couple of them are even puntastic. Brilliant! You see, there's a bad guy called Roo who some other guys are "tangled up with". Then there's Max who goes to get a tattoo - but does he go through with it? Hence "Blood on the Max?". I truly think that the titles come first and then the writers were made to come up with stories to fit them. It's flippin' superb and made my week. Honestly.
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